ive always had a keen sense of history. no, not like sensing world history but sensing my own history. it turns out not everyone is aware of the passing of time the way i am. in fact, it seems, some people stumble-bum through life never really cognizant of their past, present and future.
but not i!
why, it is practically a mutant gift i have. you know, this sensing of time.
maybe a few examples are in order:
when i was 4 i discovered that smokey the bear had died. i quickly realized that this meant i would die and more importantly that my parents would one day die. i ran to my mom in tears over this painful discovery.
when i was 7 i remember being melancholy at my birthday realizing i would only be 7 this once. that it would all be a memory one day.
when i was 13 remember being depressed when driving home from a family vacation. i remember feeling that i would never be a kid again nor enjoy the innocence of childhood again. adulthood was near and i knew it.
today its somewhat different. im still very cognizant of the passing of time but rather than being down about it, i try to use it to my advantage. i do the things i want to do now, because now is passing quickly. i say the things i want to say. befriend those i want as friends. disregard those i dont.
i guess when you realize how short life is you can get sad or get busy.
2 comments:
nice post. indeed, you always had more of an ability to figure such things out than i did.
I remember the day that was the high point of my life quite vividly. It was the day I got my full driver's license, and I went for a ride down a country road ALL BY MYSELF. It was quite exhilarating.
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